A lot of people... or a group?

Daniel Bar-Tal is an Israeli psychologist. His studies and research are part of the social psychology area, from the basic group structure to the particular conflicts that define some of them, like the Israeli-Jewish society. Some of his work focused to the basics of the socio-psychology is so well explained that my Social Psychology teacher uses them as basic bibliography for the class. That’s where I read it for the first time.

The concept of “group beliefs” is used to talk about everything that defines a psychological group. If we want to say that a group of people is a psychological group, they must share a lot of concepts, values, goals, and well, beliefs, about themselves and the world around them. This means they have to see thing in a similar way, if they want to understand each other and live happily ever after, without the group breaking apart.

For example, if they like a soccer team, they must all like the same one; if anyone likes another one, that person should not be part of that psychological group, because his/her beliefs are different and set him apart. Of course, this is only when the group existence is about football. Maybe they don’t like the same music, but that’s not the reason they are together, so, it doesn’t matter.

I like social psychology, and I like simple things that have big implications. The “group beliefs” is a basic concept, but it explains, in my opinion, a big part of how groups are born. I mean, Bar-Tal explains that the most basic belief that must be shared is “we are a group”, what can be more obvious, and a same time, more important?

Yeah...

Happiness?

Great movie.

I have always thought that happiness is something impossible to obtain. Or, if not impossible, it won’t last; humans tend to want things they don’t have, and when they get them, it’s not how they thought it would be. Technology is a very good example: you want the phone that came out a month ago, you buy the phone, and then you start to notice all the downsides it has. Of course, the fact that the industry develops a new, improved version of the same phone every 2 weeks helps a lot.

Our ability to simulate the future, to think about possibilities, is what makes this pursuit of happiness possible. We always try to choose the best option, the one that will give us more pleasure, that we’ll like the most. However, just like Gilbert showed, we are often wrong.

This synthetic happiness that Daniel Gilbert talks about seems like the solution. We create it when we don’t get what we wanted, when our decisions don’t give us what we thought and we lose (or don’t win), basically to make us feel better. It’s good when you didn’t have any option, when circumstances are more than you can handle… but it’s also like nature telling you to stop whining and start to like what you have, or at least that’s what it seem to me. Sure, you can be happy anyway, that’s great, but I think that actually being happy anyway can make you a conformist that stops worrying about the world around you.

It’s an extreme case, I won’t deny it, but it’s not impossible.

I'm a bad person.

Donkey Kong.

It’s difficult for me to think about a guilty pleasure, because I actually don’t think I have any. I like some weird things, and everyone, or at least most of the people who know me, understand that clearly, so there’s no “guilt” in my “pleasures”.

However, there is something that people usually can’t believe until they see me, and after they do, some of them try to bother me using it. So, I decided to stop talking about it.

I like watching shows like Caso Cerrado. The reason is pure entertainment. I think it’s very funny to see people arguing over something stupid, like who takes the dog after de divorce, or two women that have been dating the same guy for months, and thy found out a week before the show, and they both say “HE IS MIIIIIINE!”. Okay, that last thing is not very funny if I say it like that, but it suddenly turns hilarious when the dude is a lazy old man who “works” as a thief and uses all his money to go to bars and strip clubs and looks like Donkey Kong without the tie, and both girls are beautiful twenty year-olds, first of their respective classes in Harvard and heirs of a big, rich family. Or maybe they are even uglier than the man. Or maybe even siamese twins, or whatever.

You know, now that I think about it, maybe there is some guilt in this. Their problems are real, they feel bad about them, they really want help… and I laugh while watching. Even worse, I will be a psychologist.

I’m a bad person.